Yesterday, the largest class-action suit ever against a restaurant
chain was filed, against "Cracker Barrel" restaurants. You know,
those crappy log-cabin looking places along the highway that always
seem to share land with a Bob's Big Boy. Rocking chairs out front,
country music, all that's missing is Cletus with his shotgun, and
that old toothless guy that sits at the edge of town and laughs at
people.
Anyhoo, they're being sued for discrimination against African-
Americans, seating them in the smoking section, long waits for their
orders, etc. – and that's when they weren't being outright ignored.
Your basic, run-of-the-mill Denny's-type activity. You'd think they
would have learned by now. Besides being archaic, it's just rude. And
now, it may cost them $100 million.
Then again, what do you expect from a place called "Cracker Barrel?"
Hello? It's a barrel for Crackers. Country Crackers. And trust me,
any African-Americans that did try to go there did so as a last
resort, probably because the Roy Rogers at that rest stop was closed.
Now that I think about it, with a name like that, they were begging
for a discrimination suit. What's next, a fast-food version called
the "Klan Kounter?" C'mon folks, think.
And much like I wondered with the Denny's thing, how does this spread
across your entire chain? Is there something in the franchise
operations manual with little diagrams of black people, with
instructions like:
"Wait as long as possible before approaching the black people. If you
ignore them for long enough, they'll just leave."
"If forced to seat them (ie. the restaurant is empty), be sure to use
the word `boy' when referring to the male member(s) of the party, and
make them feel as unwelcome as possible."
"Rather than put their order in, take this time to call your friends,
stand in the kitchen and point at them, and fix your makeup and
beehive hairdo."
Crackers, dear crackers. It's tough enough competing with Shoney's,
Denny's, and those damn Boston Markets that keep popping up all over
the place. So Joe-Bobs, you shouldn't be treating any customers
poorly, especially a long-oppressed minority that's sick of taking
your good-ol' boy CRAP. As a matter of fact, there are a lot of
people not in that group who will stop coming to your restaurants,
too. So you're gonna lose money now, no matter what. And guess what
Lerlene – this is a baaaad time to be losing money. How will you make
your trailer payments???
So, folks, even if you don't lose the lawsuit, and keep
discriminating, it won't be long before you really are living in a
barrel.
And don't expect to settle out of court. Because $100 million can buy
a LOT of crackers.
That's the rant.
