Maybe you knew it was coming. Maybe you didn’t.
You’ve been dumped.
So, other than moping around in your pajamas, spending quality time with Ben & Jerry, what can you do? Well, clear away that mountain of soggy tissues, and I’ll show you how to get through it.
Three things: Take care of yourself. Give yourself time to mourn. Move forward.
The first 48 hours.
The first 48 hours are the toughest. Take at least one full weekend to cry your eyes out, eat junk food and lie around on your couch in a broken-heart coma watching sappy movies or a kung-fu marathon. Don’t call your ex. Next, force yourself to accept it’s over. I know that’s tough right now, but it truly is necessary. Grieve for what it was, but consider it dead and gone.
The first week.
After your first 48 hours, it’s important to get off the couch and take a shower. Not just for hygiene reasons, (but trust me, by this time you’ll really need it) but because it’s now time to start taking action. Take down all photos that include your ex. If you need to have a ceremonial snapshot torching, by all means, go ahead. If you’re starting to miss your ex, sit down immediately and make a list of all the things about them that really annoyed you - the more humorous, the better.
· The way he gave the exact same 22-minute response to every single person who asked how his job was going for three solid years.
· The way she tried to hold in her sneezes, producing that imploding, snorty noise instead….
· The psycho-squirrel noises he made when he laughed.
Don’t call your ex. Start returning to your normal life. Take extra time with your appearance this week. Sure, you may not feel like getting dressed at all, but, if you look good, you’ll feel better. Nothing smoothes the ragged edges of a recent break-up like a few well-timed compliments.
Make plans with friends every weekend for the next month. Get out and go dancing. The music and physical activity will make you feel tons better. Exercise four times this week. Yeah, I know you won’t feel like it, but do it anyway. You need those happy endorphins exercise brings. Get out of the house. One last thing for this week, schedule a massage. You need it!
The second week.
Don’t call your ex. Make a detailed list of all your good qualities. Pamper yourself . Get a pedicure, or sit in the sauna. You’ve been through a lot, and you deserve it. Spend some of your newfound time (and probably extra cash, too) on something just for you. Guys, you may be feeling the need for some type of electronic device you’ve been putting off. Now is the time. Girls, all I can say is, SHOE SHOPPING!
The last two weeks.
Don’t call your ex. The worst is almost over. Start easing back into your pre-girl/pre-guy routine. Be selfish with your time, and do exactly what you want to do. Make long-range plans: One for a vacation, and one for your life. You have a clean slate, what do you want to do? Go back to school? Become a rock star? Learn how to make crawfish traps? Nobody’s holding you back now.
Holy Moly! You’re through the thick of it now, and on the road to recovery. Someday, you’ll meet someone who will love and appreciate you for the amazing person you are. And this break-up, which is so awful now, will just be one forgotten U- turn on your path to true love.
